Bankers protest over giving money to people

The City of London was rocked to the core today after Chancellor George Osborne announced a rise on the banking levy to £2.5 Billion pounds. Many bankers are appalled that their hard work in begging the government for money will be squandered on luxuries and bonuses of hospitals, schools and investment. One banker said “it’s scandalous, we worked really hard wrecking the global economy, then we only got £2 million in bonuses, now we’re bailing out the public.”

The Chancellor said that the economic climate that “the Public not paying their bills” caused, has meant he has to take it out on the downtrodden banks. Protest have been happening around the city today with “small scale slapping” occurring around various champagne bars.

The head of RBS, Sir Ian Bailey-out remarked at a conference ” We’re just whipping boys for the government, we’re being martyred because people screwed up.. Can’t they see that hospitals aren’t as important as low low interest rates, and a buy now pay next year loan agreement”

The main fear among the public is that bankers will now mention this “bail out” at every given interaction.

 

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